Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize