I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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