We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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