Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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