What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize