Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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