Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
