This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
