addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
