he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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