I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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