ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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