I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
