so that wasnt chicken after all
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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