some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
