she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
How external is "for external use only"?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Randomize
