if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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