my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize