ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
