let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize