ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
worst night to have a conscience
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
