I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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