The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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