Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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