thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
