between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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