how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
