Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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