So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
We need to rekindle our bromance
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
