I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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