she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize