I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
