Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Houston, we have a squirter
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
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