i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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