i would punch a child for taco bell
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Alive.
So much puke
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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