Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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