i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
third nipple confirmed
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
