dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize