Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
