I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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