bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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