Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
