There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
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