Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
is that a dick in a sweater?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
