is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize