We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
