bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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