You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize