I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
