My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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